


dainty.

by snowangels



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Choi Chanhee | New-centric, Fluff, Gang Rape, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Rape Recovery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-08-11
Packaged: 2019-12-25 17:32:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18266093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowangels/pseuds/snowangels
Summary: chanhee was always so small and fragile; juyeon was afraid he would break sometimes.





	1. Chapter 1

it was late and cold, chanhee could feel himself shivering underneath his black coat. technically, it wasn’t really his; it was juyeon’s. but, he couldn’t find his coat on his way out, and with the olders being the only one in sight, he couldn’t help but take it. he certaintly didn’t want to waste their managers time by walking all the way to his room to recieve his own coat.

all the pink haired boy was needed for was singing. it took about half an hour of him recording lines of a side-track of a new album, and then he was sent on his way. he wished they hadn’t called him so late though, for now he was walking in the dark night all alone. he found it slightly terrifying.

still, be trudged on, walking quickly to try and get back to the dorm quicker. he was so cold, and he couldn’t wait to get home and cuddle up with changmin in the youngers bed bed, underneath his big wool cover, maybe watch a romantic comedy or sad drama that they’d both cry about-

chanhee bumped into something heavy. he almost fell onto his bottom, but someone from behind him grabbed his arms and saved him. he pulled away from the figure and looked up to see a heavyset man staring at him. 

 _weird_.

”um, sorry,” chanhee said kindly, bowing slightly to the older man in front of him and then trying to walk around him. the man reached his arm out though, grabbing his upper arm tightly. chanhee pulled at the hold, but the older man wouldn’t budge, “uh sir, please let go.”

the man ignored him, simply continued to look at the idol in his hold. chanhee frantically looked to the right of him to see three other men just standing there watching. _what_ _the_ _hell_.

the stranger holding him pulled him closer, making chanhee try yet again to pull away, but with no sucess, “you’re pretty.”

chanhee looked back up at the man with wide eyes, finally understanding what this guy wanted. he shrieked, pulling so harshly that the mans grip finally loosened. he ran, desperatley turned the corner of the street, only for someone to grab him by his waist and his face.

he kicked in the air, fighting the entire way as one of the other men dragged him back. his hand was on chanhee’s mouth, muffling him, and he didn’t seemed effected by chanhee’s scratches or punches.

 _shit shit shit shit_.

the man dragged him into an alley where the other men already were, and then dropped him. before he could scramble up, someone kicked him in the back, so heavy and harsh that he felt all air leave him for a few seconds.

he felt someone touch his arms and he kicked and screamed, but a slap to the face silenced him as it turned his head harshly to the side. tears were pricking in his eyes as he felt hands grab his wrists and pin then above his head.

not wanting to just give up, he opened his mouth and started to scream again, but something sticky pressed over his mouth and soon all that came out were mumbled words.

the same tape wrapped around his wrists harshly, leaving him trapped. he couldn’t breath anymore as they all looked over him with dark want in their eyes. 

“he’s weak,” the one standing above him laughed, and then sat above him, starting to push his shirt up. all chanhee could ask himself was _when did they take his coat? juyeon would be so mad._

 _”_ he’s so tiny,” the man touching him mumbled, running his hands over his stomach and sides, “he’s like a little girl.”

the other men laughed at that, which made chanhee turn red and try to turn his head away. one of the men must have noticed, because they grabbed his face harshly by his cheeks and pinched, making him look up at his assaulter, “what, the pretty little girls embarassed? don’t be babydoll.”

chanhee felt something rough connect with his collarbone and he squeaked, trying to pull his head away but not being able to due to the man holding his face. he chuckled, amused by the whole thing, “she makes cute little sounds.”

finally, his face was let go, and chanhee turned to the side, closing his eyes and trying to hide his tears. he was embarassed ultimatley; from the pronouns, from the men overpowering him so easily, and from how this man was crushing his whole body as he lay overtop him.

he was more terrified about the last one, actually. he could feel something poking at his thigh as a harsh mouth sucked and kissed and bit at his soft skin. 

hands connected with his leggings and he desperatley tried to pull away, but he couldn’t. chanhee could only squirm as the man pulled his leggings and his underwear away in one tug, throwing them somewhere behind him. his huge hands wrapped fully around each thigh and squeezed, making chanhee whine and try to pull away again, only for the one holding his wrists to tug painfully at his hair for the attempt.

”so delicate, like a little doll,” the man touching him muttered to himself as his hands spread his legs apart. chanhee whined pitfully, tears falling freely down his red tinted face.

one of the other men bent looked down and whistled, “really is a dude. good thing he’s small, easier to ignore it.”

the one holding his lower half nodded and then skmething pressed inside him. he cried painfully, trying to get away only to again be pulled by his hair again for his efforts. he desperatley tried to close his legs, but he couldn’t as the man sat between them. he continued to push what he could guess where his fingers in before-

a harsh thrust that moved his fragile body forward, knocking his head into the knees of the man holding his wrists and his hair. he felt liquid rush down his legs as the man continued and all chanhee could do was whine, beg, and cry. 

and when the man was finished, he felt all hope leave his body as someone else took his place between his shaking legs.

they turned him around to smack him on his bottom, jolting him from the pain. called him slut and whore and all he could remember was that this man was much worse than the first.

the pain was the worst at the fourth, though. he felt on fire as the man left from inside him. chanhee’s legs were trembling in their open position, and after a few seconds, he slowly let them rest on the ground. whoever was holding his hands let go as the group talked, and then he heard footsteps walking away.

and all he could continue to do was cry.


	2. Chapter 2

 

it’s colder than it was before. though, it’s only to chanhee. he can barely keep himself up right and walk down the streets. he stumbles occasionaly and feels himself about to fall, only to balance himself with a hand resting on the side of a building. he was only wearing his torn shirt and jeans, stained now due to the blood dripping down his legs.

he held tightly onto juyeon’s coat, making sure not to wear it. he didn’t want to taint it, for he was so so dirty now. all over. every part of him ruined.

he found himself home as the clock struck three in the morning. he silently unlocked the door and prayed for no one to be awake. no one was, and so he placed juyeon’s coat gently onto the coat rack and then walked towards the bathroom.

—

_slut._

_nothing but a good fuck._

—

juyeon sits next to him on the couch the next morning. chanhee’s wearing a hoodie and a turtleneck underneath to hide his neck, along with a pair of pajama pants that swallowed him whole. he had never loved the feeling more.

”what time did you come home last night?” juyeon asked with interested, frowning a bit, “i wanted to stay up and wait for you but sangyeon said not to.”

chanhee silently thanked sangyeon in his head. the leader knew that meetings with their managers could run late. if only that’s what had happened last night.

“can’t remember,” chanhee mumbled back. he watched younghoon grab their garbage bag, getting ready to dump it outside and let the dumpster take care of it. only chanhee knew that his bloody clothes would be crushed along with everything else.

”chanhee?”

the pink haired boy looked up towards juyeon, and noticed that his hand was touching his. he pulled away; juyeon didn’t deserve having to touch something as dirty as him, “yeah?”

juyeon frown deepened, upset about the lose of contact it seemed. still, he replied, “are you okay?”

no, truthfully, he wasn’t. he could still feel then on him,  _in him._ he just wanted to stand under scorching hot water again, as he did last night, and scrub scrub srcub. but it was no use. the feeling never went away; he couldn’t make himself feel clean.

and the voices. they still echoed in his head. over and over. pathetic slut. worthless whore. little  _girl._ it brought him back to when he was growing up, with a mom who wanted a daughter too much and boys who bullied him because of it. it mixed and it merged until it was all a big abstract picture in his mind. it brought all his minor paints, let them crush him futher and further as he was pounded and thrusted into. like he was nothing.

he wasn’t okay.

”i’m okay.” 

—

 _see how far his legs can spread_.

_make him whine again._

_like a little bitch._

_she likes it._

_(no he doesn’t)._

_(please make it stop)._

_—_

chanhee remembers when he was a trainee and some other trainee pulled him aside from the other. he pulled him into a practice room and asked him how he was so thin.

he told him he was naturally small; fast metabolism. the trainee hadn’t looked convinced, and continued to ask him. eventually, he got upset and left the room.

chanhee found out that he wasn’t loosing the weight their manager wanted him to loose. and then he found him puking in the toilets. and dumping whole meals in the trash. and he didn’t say anything.

sometimes, he wishes he did, because then he might still be around.

sometimes he wishes he wasn’t such a coward. he wishes he could talk about how his mother made him grow up. how kids bullied him for looking too girly. how trainees did the same. how he was raped by four men and he was in so much pain.

and at night, the first day over of his suffering, he wishes he wasn’t a coward more than he ever has. because it hurts.

it hurts so much.


	3. Chapter 3

_hands on thighs. fingers dig into them, they leave bruises that are red that could turn into purple with time._

_mouth on neck. sucking and kissing and **biting** **down** so hard it hurts. _

_hands hold down his arms by circling his wrists, tight tight **tight so tight they’re going to break him-**_

_he cries._

_he cries so hard his chest heaves and only tears and snot cover his face. he must be ugly, why do they continue? why do they not care?_

_he’s saying no._

_he’s saying **no.**_

_**”no!”** _

_**”stop!”** _

_they don’t care._

_no one cares._

_it hurts._

_everything hurts._

_pain, kissing, holding him down, biting, spreading his legs, laughing, **pain-**_

”chanhee!”

the pink haired boy jerks away. he looks up to see juyeon in front of him, a frown on his face along with worry sketched alongside it. chanhee can feel the wetness on his face, can feel his heart beat quicker than ever, and he doesn’t know how to explain. 

“nightmare,” chanhee mumbles, because that’s honestly what it was, “sorry.” 

juyeons frown stays, “it’s okay.”

he reaches out and touches chanhee’s arm, who flinches violently because  _holding him down, it hurts, bruises and bites and pain-_

“sorry,” juyeon apologizes, pulling his hand away. chanhee shivers in his place, shrugging his shoulders as if to say it was okay. juyeon stands up after that and leaves the room, chanhee mumbling that he wanted to be alone. 

but maybe juyeon really left because he could see how disgusting he was. 

he was dirty. dirty, so dirty. 

he stood up too quick and fell to the floor, whimpering as tears filled his eyes again. he couldn’t breathe, all he could think about were  _hands on him, holding him down while they **fucked him like he was nothing-**_

he carefully stood, trudging his way to the bathroom outside his room quickly. once there, he locked the door and turned the shower on hot, letting the steam fill the room. not even bothering to take his clothes off, instead sinking to the bottom of the tub.

crying, sobbing.

he wished he truly was nothing at all. 


End file.
